I don’t even know what to do with this life anymore. I don’t have the urge, the drive, or the motivation to finish what I have started. I have already spent four freakin years in this place and instead of feeling a little bit of freedom, I feel stuck.
I don’t think Physical Therapy is really for me. I ask myself everyday for the past few weeks. Why Physical Therapy? I always end up with the answer why not?
It’s not enough. I feel like taking this five-year course is such a burden. We don’t even get a total summer break!!! I just feel so tired. I used to be this happy, cheery, optimistic person and suddenly, all of those just went of in a blink of an eye.
I don’t know what happened but what I have found out was that one month was all it took to change the person I was back then to the sad, unfocused and lost person I am now. I don’t know what I’m doing. I want to become everything. I want to be good at everything but I don’t want to become a Physical Therapist. I feel like I have wasted four years of my life learning things I never wanted to practice.
I do hope I change my mind once I get into internship. All these fvckin facebook posts makes me even more depressed. I feel like I am such a failure. I don’t even have anyone to talk to about this. Anyway, I still have to study for a final exam tomorrow.